Friday, April 27, 2012

Project 52 | Week 17 | Heartbreak

Sometimes you ache for others because they're going through something so difficult and you know first hand how painful life can be.  Then that person is your best.friend.in.the.whole.universe., your only family, and your whole inside shudders with sadness hard enough to destroy the earth.  We've been holding onto her secret for weeks now but it doesn't change the truth: it happened, it is awful, and our family is hurting.  She's got details on her blog but I know they're keeping it quiet otherwise.

Did you know in the Jewish faith that the reason men are not to touch their wife after she gets her period is two fold: she is "unclean" during this period but also so that she can mourn the loss of the possibility of a child (my sister told me that)?  This separation is known as the Niddah, it starts from the day of first blood and ends on the 7th clean day post-menstruation (about 12 days).  At this point the woman takes a bath of cleansing, a kosher Mikvah.  Which usually coincides with ovulation, and the cycle begins anew with the reuniting of wife with husband.  The Jewish faith upholds the value of women and their fertility, encouraging their sexuality and praising their ability to create life.  

When this life is taken from you, we all mourn.  We all must cleanse and begin anew. Even if we always carry that mourning within us.

P.S. the photo is my wrist band from the blueberry, when we lost him/her. And the fabric is what I'd bought for his/her receiving blanket. I still keep it because I can't imagine giving it to someone else or using it now.  It's a reminder of the precious life I was never able to hold.
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