Thursday, March 31, 2011

Baby Diary: Week 29

I'm a day late, but yesterday was....not perfect.  Hard to believe we're at 30 weeks, three quarters of the way there, 10 weeks left.  I have definitely started having braxton hicks, mostly in the evening. My stomach turns rock hard and he gets seriously pissed off and starts going nuts in there until it's over.  The past 3 nights I've had false labor contractions wake me up in the middle of the night.  Usually only 2-4 contractions then I fall back asleep, eventually.  They, unlike the braxton hicks, are mildly uncomfortable (obviously, since they wake me up) and last longer. 

Yesterday my blood pressure was high and I felt woozy, dizzy, shaky, and totally sick but my doctor (actually her nurse) said it's probably just stress and to lay down for at least an hour on my left side.  Which I did.  It took about 4 hours for it to go back down to normal, so I went home to relax and try to lay down for the rest of the day.  My blood pressure has been high on and off the last 2 weeks, so I have to bring it up at my dr's appointment on the 13th.  I've had low blood pressure my whole life and so this is kind of scary.  Even though they weren't at all concerned, I am.  I have a horrible feeling (probably irrational) that this baby will come early.  Too early.  My therapist thinks it's because I'm too stressed at work. She wants me to start journaling every day until I start to feel less angry/mad/frustrated/overwhelmed with the things happening at work.  I cannot talk about any of it here because of what I do and the nature of my business and the issues, which I think is unfortunate.  Yet another reason I'm sure it's building up inside me.  Especially since I know I have only a few more months here. 

We've officially decided I will not be returning to my job after the baby's born.  At least until football season is over in late November. We've saved enough money to make that possible and it is such a relief knowing I'll be home with him until he's at least 6 months old, maybe longer.  Knowing I have a deadline is (my therapist thinks) why all of these ridiculous things that happen at work seem to be affecting me more now than they ever did before.  I've been putting up with this crap for 3 years now. I hate my job.  I'm bored with what I do, it's not challenging.  If I'm going to put our son in daycare 8 hours a day I want it to be worth it, not just for extra money. It's not just us any more.  It's not just me. Which is what I have to keep reminding myself when I get worked up, it's not just me anymore--everything I do now effects this little life.  I have got to just let stuff go.

Furniture gets delivered on the 8th (yes!) so I have to get that room cleaned up enough that they can deliver it and set it up.  Not too much, but enough.  I'm definitely nesting.  I cleaned all his bottles, cups, spoons, eating stuff last night and moved things around in our cabinets to make room for it all.  I also unwrapped his bath toys and stuff (holy moly that plastic they wrap them in STINKS, so glad they'll air out for a while) and found a shelf for them all to live on permanently in that bathroom.  Luckily for us, our house has tons of storage space.  Felt good to start finding places for all his things.  Like a little child will be running around in no time. :) Happy thoughts!
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