Thursday, May 14, 2009

These Made Me Shoot Snot Out My Nose

3PM The "Enter" Key's Somewhere Near the Middle Of Your Keyboard, Sir
Tech on phone: Please click start, type "cmd" and press enter. (pause) It should have brought up a command prompt. (pause) Nothing yet? Hmmm. Let me remote in. (starts laughing uncontrollably) Sir, you have to type "cmd" and press the enter key. Typing "cmdandpressenter" will not work. Sorry I wasn't more clear.

Dodge St
Omaha, Nebraska

Overheard by: northern lad
via Overheard in the Office, May 7, 2009

1PM Maybe They'll Also Resolve Whether I'm Pregnant or Just Getting Chubby
Slutty coworker #1: Yeah, I was thinking about signing up for the office blood drive.
Slutty coworker #2: Really? That's nice of you! They need a lot of blood right now.
Slutty coworker #1: Yeah, I guess. I heard they test your blood for like STDs and stuff before they use it. I haven't gotten checked in awhile,so I figure, why not?

Memphis, Tennessee

Overheard by: wow thats classy
via Overheard in the Office, May 13, 2009

11AM ...Again.
Assistant: Can I go home sick?
Boss: Why?
Assistant: I ate too much gum.

New York City, New York

Overheard by: OMG
via Overheard in the Office, May 12, 2009

10AM It Was a Brilliant Performance Art Piece
Associate director: So I found myself on the floor, bleeding, and all I could think was, "Really? I just cut myself with spaghetti?"

Commonwealth Ave
Boston, Massachusetts

Overheard by: cube rat
via Overheard in the Office, May 8, 2009
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