Wednesday, November 5, 2008

Am I just tired?

I am feeling drained today. I fell asleep watching the election stuff droll in, so I shouldn't be tired yet her I am trying desperately to concentrate on my Park Emergency Plan that I need to finish, while also looking at random things I'll need to do if this merge of emergency management happens between us and Keller. It would be a huge responsibility and a lot of stuff will have to happen, and I know their office over there has been just as neglected as the one here was pre-me. There's so much to think about and I keep adding to my list, while also knowing there are going to be numerous things that won't come up until it happens--if it ever even does. Maybe it's just the impending doom of stress. Plus I feel like I am never going to get my head above water financially, and although i know I am lucky I still hate debt. I don't like owing things even if it is 0% interest. It's just there nagging.

That and I keep meeting guys but they're never really what I want. Something big is usually out of place, and I know I'm being picky but I feel like I deserve to be after all the crap the last few years. I met a guy but it's totally not going to happen and he lives way far away. why is it the people you get along with immediately are always inconveniently unavailable. why is that? can someone explain that to me? I duhno. I am having a down day. The Rev (mom) comes tomorrow so I'm excited for that.

I'm taking my motorcycle safety class this weekend but can't tell Caitlin or The Rev because I know they'll be worried and upset. The Rev leaves Saturday, so I'll just get to see her Thursday and Friday evening. I think she's staying at the house though. I'm excited to just be hugged by my mother, even at 24 that brings so much comfort. I am so tired. And we're not going to do a huge Christmas present thing this year, so that's nice. So I'm officially done with my shopping. I have a couple things for everyone, but I'm stopping. Probably get one more thing for Kris but that's easy.

Well I'm going to try and finish this damn plan. *sigh* can I take a nap yet?
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